Digital Serenade

 In the quiet corners of our shared space,

She dances, lips moving to a silent song,

Capturing hearts in the digital embrace,

A crowd of strangers where she belongs.

Her beauty, radiant, draws eyes like a flame,

Compliments and echoes in a virtual sphere,

Yet in our world, it feels a distant game,

A love that seems both far and near.

I watch as she shines, a star in the night,

Her joy in the spotlight, her laughter so free,

But shadows of doubt cloud my sight,

Why not perform these serenades for me?

She says I overreact, misunderstand,

That her heart is still mine, her love just as true,

But the ache lingers, like grains of sand,

In the depths of my soul, unsure of the view.

So I seek to bridge this chasm wide,

To find the balance where both worlds meet,

To hold her close, with nothing to hide,

And dance together, hearts in sync, complete.

In Shadows Deep

 In shadows deep, where fears reside,

I grapple with the storm inside,

Lonely whispers, silent cries,

Beneath a mask of brave disguise.

Immaturity, my thorn to bear,

In love's domain, it strips me bare,

A fragile heart, a jealous mind,

In every glance, despair I find.

Her beauty, like a beacon bright,

Draws strangers' praise, ignites my fright,

Insecure, I cling, I yearn,

For trust and peace, for lessons learned.

Why should I feel this crushing weight?

Is trust in love a twist of fate?

I know her heart, it's mine to hold,

Yet fears of loss leave me cold.

To be myself, yet strive to grow,

To learn the strength I need to show,

For in her eyes, I'm more than this,

A love that's sealed with every kiss.

I'll cast aside these chains of doubt,

Embrace the path, the journey out,

With open heart, I'll find my way,

To brighter dawns, to love's pure day.

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 28 : The Rescue

The somber mood that had settled over the house after the Varalakshmi Pooja was palpable. The guests had departed, leaving behind a heavy silence that seemed to echo through the rooms. Suresh, nursing the bruises on his wife's back, looked at Ilakiya with deep concern as she lay bare on the bed, her face etched with pain.

However, the tranquility of the moment was shattered as Mrs. Meera stormed into the room, her anger still burning fiercely. In a tone that crackled with fury, she demanded, "How dare you insult our family in front of all the guests today?"

Ilakiya, her body still aching, gathered her strength and slowly rose from the bed, covering her bosom with a blanket. Her voice trembled with a mix of pain and frustration as she responded, "I've had enough, Ma. You've been making indirect jabs at me on numerous occasions, as if I'm the one who's infertile."

The room seemed to tremble with the weight of their unspoken truths. Ilakiya continued, her voice steadier now, "The truth is, despite all our efforts, we couldn't conceive because Suresh's sperm count is too low. He's essentially sterile."

Mrs. Meera's fury only seemed to intensify as Ilakiya revealed the painful truth about Suresh's infertility. She accused Ilakiya of failing to protect the family's honor and causing irreparable damage through her actions in front of the guests. Her words were sharp and stung like a swarm of bees.

"As the daughter-in-law of this family," Mrs. Meera seethed, "you should have shielded our honor. Instead, you've humiliated us in front of everyone today. You've tarnished our reputation, and how are we to walk in pride in society now? Our ancestors, in Suresh's lineage, have always been known for their fertility. They've borne many children. You, with your mixed blood, could never understand what it means to uphold our legacy."

Ilakiya, her patience worn thin, couldn't bear the accusations any longer. She stood her ground, her voice trembling with anger, yet strangely calm. "If this bloodline is as strong as you say, then how do you explain the fact that you stopped at having just one child? You couldn't bear any more children after that, could you? Infertility can affect anyone, regardless of their lineage, due to various external factors."

She turned her gaze towards Suresh, her expression filled with both sorrow and determination. "I've tried to live with Suresh despite knowing about his condition. He couldn't satisfy me sexually or help me conceive, but I've endured it all. However, I can't endure this emotional abuse any longer."

Turning to Suresh, she asked the most painful question of all, "Suresh, it's time to make a choice. Do you want your mother or me? We can't continue living under the same roof with this unbearable situation."

The room seemed to hold its breath as the weight of Ilakiya's words hung in the air. It was a moment of reckoning, where the family's future hung in the balance, torn between tradition and the harsh realities of their lives.

In the tense silence that hung in the room, Suresh found himself cornered, torn between his loyalty to his mother and his love for his wife, Ilakiya. His silence spoke volumes, and in that moment, he made a choice that would echo through their lives.

With a heavy heart, he looked at Ilakiya and whispered, "Ma, I'm sorry, but I can't go against my mother." It was a confession that cut deep into Ilakiya's soul, revealing that Suresh was a man not bound by principles but by the chains of his mother's expectations.

Ilakiya, her eyes brimming with tears, felt a mixture of pain and resignation. She had hoped that love would conquer all, that Suresh would stand up for her in her time of need. But now, she realized that he was not the man she had believed him to be.

Rather than continuing to live with a cowardly man who couldn't defend her or their love, Ilakiya made a painful decision. She knew that leaving her marriage would mean leaving behind not just the man she loved but also the life she had known. However, she was determined to find her own path, even if it meant starting from scratch.

Meera, in her commanding tone, turned to Ilakiya and said, "Pack your belongings and leave immediately. You no longer have a place in this house."

The demand came as a seismic shock to Ilakiya, even though she had expected it deep down. The weight of those words, the finality of the decision, hit her like a tidal wave. She stood there, stunned and heartbroken, her mind racing with a whirlwind of emotions.

Suresh, still in silence, made no move to stop his wife from leaving. His inability to stand up for her or make a choice between the two most important women in his life was a silent admission of his own weakness.

As Ilakiya began to gather her belongings, her tears fell like silent raindrops. She knew that this was not just the end of her marriage but also the end of a chapter in her life. With each item she packed, she left behind a piece of her heart and the dreams she had once held.

In the midst of this emotional turmoil, the door of their home opened, letting in the harsh reality of the world outside. Ilakiya was about to step into an uncertain future, alone, yet determined to find her own path and rebuild her life on her terms.

As Ilakiya stood at the threshold of uncertainty, her heart heavy with the weight of her shattered marriage, she sought solace in the darkness that had enveloped her life. She knew she couldn't return to her parents' home without an explanation, and in her vulnerable state, she feared their judgment.

The taxi ride to TBS, where the last bus to her hometown of JB awaited, felt like a journey into the unknown. With each passing mile, her thoughts grew more tumultuous. What would she say to her parents? How would she explain the events that had unfolded, the failure of her marriage, and the emotional scars she now carried?

She knew all too well the expectations of her parents, who, like many in their conventional patriarchal society, placed the honor of the family squarely on the shoulders of their daughters. Women from failed marriages were often regarded as a source of humiliation, a stain on the family's reputation.

As Ilakiya reached the bustling terminal of TBS, she felt a rising uncertainty about the path she was about to take. The weight of societal norms pressed down on her, making her question her decision to return home.

Then, in that moment of inner turmoil, she made a choice. She reached for her phone and dialed the number of the one person she believed would stand by her side, the person she could rely on in her darkest hours – Anbu.

The phone rang, each tone resonating with her hopes and fears. When Anbu's voice finally answered on the other end, it was like a lifeline in the stormy sea of her emotions.

"Anbu," Ilakiya's voice quivered, "it's Ilakiya."

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 27 : The Expulsion

The somber mood that had settled over the house after the Varalakshmi Pooja was palpable. The guests had departed, leaving behind a heavy silence that seemed to echo through the rooms. Suresh, nursing the bruises on his wife's back, looked at Ilakiya with deep concern as she lay bare on the bed, her face etched with pain.

However, the tranquility of the moment was shattered as Mrs. Meera stormed into the room, her anger still burning fiercely. In a tone that crackled with fury, she demanded, "How dare you insult our family in front of all the guests today?"

Ilakiya, her body still aching, gathered her strength and slowly rose from the bed, covering her bosom with a blanket. Her voice trembled with a mix of pain and frustration as she responded, "I've had enough, Ma. You've been making indirect jabs at me on numerous occasions, as if I'm the one who's infertile."

The room seemed to tremble with the weight of their unspoken truths. Ilakiya continued, her voice steadier now, "The truth is, despite all our efforts, we couldn't conceive because Suresh's sperm count is too low. He's essentially sterile."

Mrs. Meera's fury only seemed to intensify as Ilakiya revealed the painful truth about Suresh's infertility. She accused Ilakiya of failing to protect the family's honor and causing irreparable damage through her actions in front of the guests. Her words were sharp and stung like a swarm of bees.

"As the daughter-in-law of this family," Mrs. Meera seethed, "you should have shielded our honor. Instead, you've humiliated us in front of everyone today. You've tarnished our reputation, and how are we to walk in pride in society now? Our ancestors, in Suresh's lineage, have always been known for their fertility. They've borne many children. You, with your mixed blood, could never understand what it means to uphold our legacy."

Ilakiya, her patience worn thin, couldn't bear the accusations any longer. She stood her ground, her voice trembling with anger, yet strangely calm. "If this bloodline is as strong as you say, then how do you explain the fact that you stopped at having just one child? You couldn't bear any more children after that, could you? Infertility can affect anyone, regardless of their lineage, due to various external factors."

She turned her gaze towards Suresh, her expression filled with both sorrow and determination. "I've tried to live with Suresh despite knowing about his condition. He couldn't satisfy me sexually or help me conceive, but I've endured it all. However, I can't endure this emotional abuse any longer."

Turning to Suresh, she asked the most painful question of all, "Suresh, it's time to make a choice. Do you want your mother or me? We can't continue living under the same roof with this unbearable situation."

The room seemed to hold its breath as the weight of Ilakiya's words hung in the air. It was a moment of reckoning, where the family's future hung in the balance, torn between tradition and the harsh realities of their lives.

In the tense silence that hung in the room, Suresh found himself cornered, torn between his loyalty to his mother and his love for his wife, Ilakiya. His silence spoke volumes, and in that moment, he made a choice that would echo through their lives.

With a heavy heart, he looked at Ilakiya and whispered, "Ma, I'm sorry, but I can't go against my mother." It was a confession that cut deep into Ilakiya's soul, revealing that Suresh was a man not bound by principles but by the chains of his mother's expectations.

Ilakiya, her eyes brimming with tears, felt a mixture of pain and resignation. She had hoped that love would conquer all, that Suresh would stand up for her in her time of need. But now, she realized that he was not the man she had believed him to be.

Rather than continuing to live with a cowardly man who couldn't defend her or their love, Ilakiya made a painful decision. She knew that leaving her marriage would mean leaving behind not just the man she loved but also the life she had known. However, she was determined to find her own path, even if it meant starting from scratch.

Meera, in her commanding tone, turned to Ilakiya and said, "Pack your belongings and leave immediately. You no longer have a place in this house."

The demand came as a seismic shock to Ilakiya, even though she had expected it deep down. The weight of those words, the finality of the decision, hit her like a tidal wave. She stood there, stunned and heartbroken, her mind racing with a whirlwind of emotions.

Suresh, still in silence, made no move to stop his wife from leaving. His inability to stand up for her or make a choice between the two most important women in his life was a silent admission of his own weakness.

As Ilakiya began to gather her belongings, her tears fell like silent raindrops. She knew that this was not just the end of her marriage but also the end of a chapter in her life. With each item she packed, she left behind a piece of her heart and the dreams she had once held.

In the midst of this emotional turmoil, the door of their home opened, letting in the harsh reality of the world outside. Ilakiya was about to step into an uncertain future, alone, yet determined to find her own path and rebuild her life on her terms.

As Ilakiya stood at the threshold of uncertainty, her heart heavy with the weight of her shattered marriage, she sought solace in the darkness that had enveloped her life. She knew she couldn't return to her parents' home without an explanation, and in her vulnerable state, she feared their judgment.

The taxi ride to TBS, where the last bus to her hometown of JB awaited, felt like a journey into the unknown. With each passing mile, her thoughts grew more tumultuous. What would she say to her parents? How would she explain the events that had unfolded, the failure of her marriage, and the emotional scars she now carried?

She knew all too well the expectations of her parents, who, like many in their conventional patriarchal society, placed the honor of the family squarely on the shoulders of their daughters. Women from failed marriages were often regarded as a source of humiliation, a stain on the family's reputation.

As Ilakiya reached the bustling terminal of TBS, she felt a rising uncertainty about the path she was about to take. The weight of societal norms pressed down on her, making her question her decision to return home.

Then, in that moment of inner turmoil, she made a choice. She reached for her phone and dialed the number of the one person she believed would stand by her side, the person she could rely on in her darkest hours – Anbu.

The phone rang, each tone resonating with her hopes and fears. When Anbu's voice finally answered on the other end, it was like a lifeline in the stormy sea of her emotions.

"Anbu," Ilakiya's voice quivered, "it's Ilakiya."

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 26 : The Explosion

Two long and challenging years had passed since their journey to Kerala for fertility treatment. Despite their unwavering efforts and numerous attempts to conceive, the couple remained childless. Mrs. Meera, a woman deeply rooted in superstition, had fervently prayed to every deity she could think of, never letting go of hope.

As the days went by, anticipation filled the air in their neighborhood as families readied themselves for the auspicious Varalakshmi Vratam. This special day was dedicated to prayer and devotion to the goddess of wealth and prosperity, and Suresh's family was honored to host the Pooja at their home. Sumangalis from the neighborhood gathered, with Ilakiya, their daughter-in-law, at the heart of the preparations.

The sacred altar was adorned with vibrant flowers and offerings, and the family came together for the Varalakshmi Pooja event. Mrs. Meera, the family's matriarch, saw this as the perfect moment to address a matter that had been gnawing at her for some time. With a benevolent smile, she turned to Ilakiya, her voice trembling with hope.

"Dear Ilakiya," Mrs. Meera began, her eyes filled with longing, "may Goddess Varalakshmi bless you with fertility and grant us the joy of a child in our family."

Ilakiya, her grace and confidence unwavering, humbly touched Mrs. Meera's feet, seeking her blessings. But she couldn't let this poignant moment pass without addressing the unspoken truth. "Thank you, Athé," Ilakiya replied respectfully, her voice gentle yet resolute, "but I want you to know that I have always been highly fertile, with regular cycles and every effort to ensure high fertility."

The silence that followed was profound, for Ilakiya's words hinted at a deeper issue—one that perhaps lay with her husband, Suresh. Mrs. Meera's smile faded as she grasped the implication, and Suresh's face flushed with embarrassment.

The truth hung in the air like an unspoken curse. Both Mrs. Meera and Suresh had their egos bruised, and their unspoken expectations had clashed. Mrs. Meera had hoped to place the blame on Ilakiya, convinced that her family's history of fertility should guarantee success. Meanwhile, Suresh, burdened by his own shame and fear, couldn't confront the reality of his own issue.

The Varalakshmi Pooja event, intended to bring blessings and harmony, had unwittingly become a stage for hidden tensions and unspoken truths. As the family continued with their prayers, a cloud of unease settled over their household. It was a poignant reminder that sometimes, life's most complex challenges required more than just the blessings of the divine.

Ilakiya's words had inadvertently wounded Mrs. Meera's ego, and her face twisted with anger, her blessings turning into curses. It was a shocking turn of events, one that left the guests bewildered and the air heavy with hostility.

In her rage, Mrs. Meera seized a ceremonial firestick nearby, her trembling hands clutching it fiercely. With a fiery glare, she lunged at Ilakiya, her voice seething with fury. "You dare insult our family's traditions and question my son's fertility, you wretched woman!"

Ilakiya, taken aback by the sudden attack, barely had time to react. She tried to shield herself, but the blows from the stick rained down upon her. The guests gasped in horror as they watched a sacred ceremony morph into a violent spectacle.

"Amma, please stop!" Suresh finally found his voice, but his words were feeble, his actions even weaker. He made no effort to intervene or protect his wife.

Ilakiya, now in tears and pain, felt a profound sense of betrayal. She had expected her husband to stand up for her, to shield her from this onslaught. Yet, there he stood, passive and unmoving, paralyzed by guilt and shame.

One particularly strong blow struck Ilakiya's back, causing her to cry out in agony. The pain was excruciating, and her vision blurred. She crumpled to the floor, her consciousness slipping away.

Amid the chaos, an elderly guest bravely stepped forward and confronted Mrs. Meera. "Stop this madness, Mrs. Meera! This is a sacred event, and your actions bring shame upon us all."

Mrs. Meera, her anger not yet quenched, reluctantly dropped the stick and stepped back. Ilakiya lay unconscious on the floor, her body battered and bruised.

The elderly guest, along with a few others, tended to Ilakiya's injuries and called for medical help. Suresh, his face ashen with guilt, finally realized the gravity of his inaction. He rushed to his wife's side, tears streaming down his face, but it was too late to undo the damage that had been done.

The Varalakshmi Pooja event, meant to bring blessings and harmony, had transformed into a tragic and painful chapter in their lives. Ilakiya's wounds ran deeper than the physical ones; she felt wounded not just by her mother-in-law's attack but also by her husband's betrayal. As they say, sometimes the scars that are hardest to heal are the ones inflicted by those closest to us.

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 25 : Kerala Trip

    The atmosphere at KLIA 2 airport was bustling with activity as travelers rushed to and fro, making their way through the terminal. The sound of announcements blared over the loudspeakers, signaling the arrival and departure of flights. 

    The smell of freshly brewed coffee and the aroma of different foods from the restaurants filled the air. The check-in counters were crowded with people, some excitedly chatting with their loved ones while others were focused on getting their paperwork in order. 

    The staff at the airport were bustling around, trying to keep up with the demands of the travelers. The couple, Suresh and Ilakiya, wove their way through the crowd, pushing their luggage trolley before them. The airport was alive with energy, the hum of voices and the constant movement of people creating a sense of excitement and anticipation. Suresh couldn't help but feel a little overwhelmed by the chaos of it all, but Ilakiya seemed to be taking it in stride.

    As they made their way to the check-in counter, they were greeted by a friendly staff. "Good morning, sir. Welcome to AirAsia."

    He smiled at her as he parked the baggage trolley and reached into his jacket pocket for his passport. The airline staff, dressed in a smart red and white uniform, asked, "Can I have your passports sir?" Suresh passed the passport together with the e-ticket printout. The staff member looked at the printout and said, "That won't be necessary, sir. We have your details here." She took only the passports and then proceeded to verify details on her system.

    Suresh waited at the check-in counter while the passports were being processed. His expression was one of dissatisfaction as he firmly crossed his arms over his chest, making it obvious that he was not pleased. He turned to see Ilakiya, who was dressed in a form fitting long sleeve white turtleneck and black pants. She had a matching white Pashmina shawl around her neck. Her eyes were lined in black and a small red dot on her forehead. She had her headphones on and tapped her foot.

    Ilakiya, noticing Suresh's scowl, removed her earbuds, coiled the wires and placed them in her black slingbag, ready to address his concerns.

    "Is this trip necessary now?" he asked in an irritated tone, "I'm in the middle of an important project that directly affects my promotion in the company."

    Ilakiya gave him a patient smile, and with a gentle hand on his arm, she said "Yes, Suresh, this trip is necessary. The ayurvedic center only accepts a limited number of people every year, and we were lucky to secure a slot. We've been planning for this for months, remember? " She helped him with his luggage as she spoke, pushing the trolley towards the check-in counter.

    "Besides," Ilakiya added, "what's the point of making all this money and not having anyone to pass it on to?" Suresh couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt as he knew she had a point. He couldn't deny that they had been trying to start a family for a while now, and the stress of work had been taking its toll on him. He thanked the airline staff and grabbed the tickets and passports from the counter.

"Nobody knows where we're going, right?" he asked, a hint of concern in his voice. Ilakiya gave him a reassuring smile and winked playfully. "Of course not, everyone knows. We're going on a month-long tour of temples in India," she said with a chuckle. "Unless the aunty next door decides to tarnish your name, I can't do anything about it." Suresh couldn't help but smile at her lighthearted comment and the two of them made their way towards the security check.

    "I could've handled it myself, my way," Suresh grumbled, still visibly unhappy about the situation. "Now I have to take a month off from my job, possibly face questions if the news spreads, and I'll be missing my appointments with the urologist." Ilakiya listened patiently, understanding his concerns.

    She raised an eyebrow and asked, "Well, you've been going to the urologist for over a year now. Has anything changed?" Suresh had to admit, he didn't have much progress to show for all his visits. Ilakiya then suggested, "Let's try this ayurvedic method for a change."

    Suresh thought for a moment, weighing the pros and cons. He knew he was running out of options and was willing to try anything that could help. He finally nodded reluctantly and said, "Fine. Let's go." Ilakiya smiled, happy that he was willing to give it a chance.

    As they approached the security checkpoint, Suresh and Ilakiya presented their boarding passes to the officer. The officer scanned the passes and looked up at them, "Cochin, Kerala," he confirmed, with a friendly smile. Ilakiya nodded and handed over her carry-on bag for inspection. The officer took a quick look through her bag and returned it to her. "Enjoy your trip," he said. Ilakiya smiled and thanked him before they proceeded to the waiting area for their flight. 

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 24 : The Man Of The House

    Ilakiya rushed through the halls of her home, her mind racing as she prepared for her court case. She had overslept due to her alarm clock not being set and was now running late. As she grabbed her case files for the divorce case she had been assigned to yesterday, she couldn't help but glance over at her husband Suresh's shelf, filled with meticulously labeled folders.

    Ilakiya couldn't resist the urge to take a peek at the folders, titled with various labels such as taxation, household expenses, insurance, and others. But one particular folder caught her attention - "Medical bills/record". She couldn't help but feel curious as she opened the folder, finding several invoices and test result slips inside.

     "What is this?", she thought to herself as she scanned through the documents. She noticed that Suresh's blood pressure levels were alarmingly high in one of the test results. 

    "Why did he not tell me about this?", Ilakiya thought as she felt a knot in her stomach. She checked the next document, but she didn't quite understand the tests performed or how to interpret the results. It was from the urology department of UMMC, a medical center that specialized in treating urinary and reproductive system disorders. 

    "What is going on with him?", she thought to herself as she felt a mix of worry and confusion. She knew she had to confront him about it when he returned home, and find out what was really going on.

    Suresh returned home later than usual that evening, and Ilakiya could tell from the smell of alcohol on his breath that he had been drinking. He tried to hide it, but Ilakiya knew him too well. His mom was sitting in the living room enjoying her daily dose of soap opera. Ilakiya was sitting on the other sofa with her feet up on the seat, sipping a hot cup of coffee in the chilly evening. Suresh greeted them both with a nod and a mumbled hello before making his way straight to his room.

    Ilakiya didn't want to confront him while he was in this state, but she knew she couldn't wait any longer. She decided to give him some time to freshen up before addressing the issue. As he took a shower and changed into fresh clothes in the bedroom, Ilakiya prepared dinner for both of them.

    When Suresh came out of the bedroom, Ilakiya greeted him with a warm smile and asked, "How was your day, dear? Dinner's ready."

    Suresh grumbled a response, clearly not in the mood for conversation. Ilakiya didn't push it and instead, they sat down to eat in silence.

    After they finished their meal, Ilakiya couldn't hold back any longer. She gently put her hand on his arm and said, "Suresh, we need to talk. I found some medical records on your shelf earlier today and I'm worried about you. What's going on? Why didn't you tell me about your high blood pressure?"

    Suresh sighed and looked away, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. He mumbled, "It's nothing, Ilakiya. I'll take care of it. Let's just drop it."

    Ilakiya knew he was trying to brush it off, but she wouldn't let him. She insisted, "No, Suresh. I'm your wife, and I care about you. You can't just ignore your health like this. We need to get to the bottom of this and make sure you get the help you need."

    Her words however, only served to anger Suresh. He slammed his fist on the table and shouted at her, "Mind your own business! I'm healthy and well. You don't need to poke your nose in unwanted businesses."

    Ilakiya felt hurt and insulted by his response. She raised her voice and retorted, "If not me, then who else is going to care for you? Your mom isn't going to be around forever. I'm your wife for God's sake." Suresh's reply was a cold and dismissive, "Ilakiya, shut up. I'm just trying to have some peace and some dinner."

    The commotion between the couple caught the attention of Suresh's mother Meera, who rushed to the dinner table, her face etched with concern. "What's wrong? What's happening here?" she asked, looking from Ilakiya to Suresh. Suresh, visibly upset, replied with a calmer tone, "It's nothing, ma. Just a small disagreement. Can a man not even have some peace at home?"

    Meera could sense the tension between the couple and defended Ilakiya. "What are you talking about, Suresh? Ilakiya is your wife, she cares for you. You should be grateful for her concern." Suresh retorted, his voice rising, "It's not like I'm having an affair elsewhere, ma. Can't you see she's just being overbearing?"

    Meera's face hardened at her son's words, "Suresh, stop right there. What are you talking about? Ilakiya is your wife and she cares for you. You should be appreciative of her care." 

    But Suresh was not in the mood to listen, "Then, she should stop behaving like a lawyer once she sets foot at home." Ilakiya's eyes welled up upon hearing this. She was hurt by his words.

    Meera noticed Ilakiya's tears and immediately rushed to her side, "Ilakiya, what's wrong? What happened?" Ilakiya told her about the medical records she found in Suresh's shelf and her concern for his health.

    Meera was shocked, "Is it true, Suresh?" she asked, turning to her son.

    Suresh shifted uneasily in his seat, "Mom, it's not that bad. I'm fine," he replied, avoiding Ilakiya's gaze.

    "What about the urologist report?," Ilakiya pressed, her voice trembling with emotion.

    Meera, not understanding the significance, asked, "What does an urologist do?"

    Ilakiya explained that a urologist deals with problems related to the reproductive system organs. With tears flowing down her face, she tried to connect the dots with Suresh's behavior of sexually ignoring her despite her efforts to excite him. Suresh kept quiet, not knowing how to respond.

    Ilakiya finally confessed, "Ma, I'm still a virgin till date even after being married for six months." Meera was shocked, her mouth hanging open in disbelief. Ilakiya's voice trembled with emotion as she spoke, "I don't understand why he's been doing this. I've been trying to be a good wife, but it feels like he doesn't care about me."

    Meera was shocked and saddened by the revelation. All this time, she had thought Ilakiya was the one incapable of conceiving. She turned to Suresh, her voice trembling with anger and disappointment, "What is the meaning of this, Suresh? Are you doubting Ilakiya?"

    Suresh shook his head, his voice low and filled with shame, "No, ma. It's not that."

    Meera's voice grew louder, "Then what's wrong? Are you in love with someone else? Why aren't you touching your wife?"

    Suresh's face twisted in anger and frustration, "No! It's not that! I'm the one who can't satisfy her!" He yelled, throwing his plate on the floor with such force that it shattered into a thousand pieces.

    Ilakiya and Meera both froze in shock, their eyes fixed on Suresh as he stood up, his voice breaking, "I have erectile dysfunction. I can't satisfy Ilakiya sexually."

    Ilakiya was still reeling from one shock after another. There was a moment of silence as they all processed the revelation. Ilakiya's heart ached for Suresh and the pain he must have been feeling. Meera's eyes filled with tears, knowing the struggles her son must have gone through, keeping this secret to himself.

    Suresh hung his head in shame, feeling guilty for not being able to fulfill his role as a husband and for causing Ilakiya pain and disappointment. Ilakiya finally spoke, her voice filled with understanding and compassion, "Suresh, it's okay. We'll get through this together. We'll get you the help you need and we'll work on our relationship".

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 23 : Ilakiya's Dilemma

    "Not again," Mrs Meera grumbled as Ilakiya marked the day red on the table calendar. It had been six months since Ilakiya and Suresh had married and she was expecting an offspring.

    Ilakiya heard the murmur but didn't react. Instead, she focused on preparing breakfast for Suresh and herself as he got ready for work. As she sat down to eat, she couldn't help but feel a sense of disappointment. She knew her mother-in-law, Mrs Meera, was growing impatient, as she had been hinting at the possibility of a grandchild for weeks now.

    Mrs Meera said, "Ilakiya, I had hoped this month is the month for us to finally hear good news."

    Ilakiya replied, "I understand your excitement, athéy, but we can't rush these things. It will happen when it's meant to happen."

    Mrs Meera sighed, "I know, I know. I just can't help but be eager to hold my grandchild in my arms."

    Ilakiya smiled, "I understand. And I promise, as soon as we have any news, you'll be the first to know."

    Mrs Meera nodded, "I'll hold you to that."

    The truth was, Ilakiya was still a virgin. Initially, it was her idea to postpone the consummation because she was still reeling from a heartbreak. She had loved Anbu deeply and had been devastated when their relationship ended.

    However, she had made up her mind and got over her ex soon after that. But she didn't know what was on Suresh's mind. She had tried hinting at him a few times, but it seemed like he wasn't interested.

    At one point, she tried spooning with him, but he had just cuddled with her and fallen asleep. Ilakiya had felt rejected and was left wondering what was wrong with her.

    She said, "Suresh, is everything okay? You seem distant lately."

    Suresh replied, "I'm fine, just a bit tired from work."

    Ilakiya nodded, "Okay, just let me know if you need anything."

    At another time, she had tried changing clothes in front of him in the nude, in the hopes of getting him excited, but he had just looked at her and then continued fiddling with his tablet. Ilakiya felt embarrassed and ashamed.

    She thought, "Maybe he doesn't find me attractive anymore. Or maybe he's in love with someone else."

    Ilakiya knew she needed to talk to Suresh about her concerns, but she didn't know how to bring up the subject without hurting his feelings or starting an argument. 

     She was determined to confront him directly and have an open conversation about it. As soon as she finished breakfast, she walked into the room where Suresh was getting ready for work.

    "Baby, I want to ask you something," she began, trying to sound as calm and confident as possible. "Remember on our wedding night when I told you that I would let you know when I was ready? Well, I'm ready now. I've been thinking about it for a while and I'm ready to start trying for a baby."

    Suresh nodded while humming without replying. He turned to her and smiled. "We don't have to rush now," he said. "You've got to finish your chambering and graduate. I'm working on my promotion project now. You're still young and we have all the time in the world."

    Ilakiya felt a sense of disappointment. She couldn't help but feel like they were delaying something that they both wanted.

    "But your mom seems to be impatient," Ilakiya pointed out. "She's been hinting at wanting a grandchild for weeks now. And my parents are also asking when we're going to start a family."

    Suresh reassured her, "Old timers are like that. They'll keep pushing you to the next progression in life. We don't have to stress ourselves about that. Let's focus on our careers and our future first."

    Ilakiya understood, but she couldn't shake off the feeling of disappointment.

    Suresh noticing the discomfort, pulled Ilakiya close and kissed her passionately. "Don't worry too much, baby," he said. "If my mom makes you uncomfortable, I'll talk to her. But now I've got work to attend. I'll see you in the evening."

    Ilakiya nodded, understanding that Suresh had a point, but still feeling a sense of disappointment. She watched as he left for work, thinking about how they would navigate their desires and the expectations of their families.

    After he left, Ilakiya also changed and left for work. On the way to work, she kept thinking about her conversation with Suresh, replaying it in her mind and analyzing it from different perspectives. She thought about the different ways they could balance their desire to start a family with their career aspirations, and how they could address the expectations of their families. Ilakiya made a mental note to talk to Suresh again once they both were free and try to come to a mutual understanding.

    As she reached her workplace, Ilakiya decided to put her feelings aside and focus on her work. She was currently doing her chambering practice at a legal aid center and had been assigned a case of a couple seeking divorce. Ilakiya was representing the husband in this case.

    She spent the morning going over the case details and preparing her arguments. As she studied the case, she found that the wife was seeking a divorce because the husband was infertile. Ilakiya couldn't help but feel a pang of empathy for the husband, as she herself had just had a conversation with her own husband about starting a family.

    She knew that representing a client in a divorce case could be emotionally taxing, but she was determined to do her best and provide her client with the best representation possible. Ilakiya took the time to understand her client's perspective, and his reasons for wanting to save the marriage despite his infertility.

    She prepared her arguments, highlighting the emotional and financial contributions of the husband to the marriage and how his infertility should not be the sole reason for the divorce. Ilakiya also emphasized the importance of communication and finding alternative options such as adoption or surrogacy to fulfill the desire of starting a family.

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 22 : Wedding Night

    Suresh and Ilakiya arrived at the groom's place, where they were greeted by the sumangalis (married elder ladies) who performed an Aarti for the newlywed couple. Ilakiya felt a sense of warmth and happiness as the sumangalis blessed them with a lit lamp, welcoming them into the family with open arms. As a token of appreciation, Suresh put a few RM 50 notes on the plate, expressing his gratitude for the warm welcome.

    Once inside the house, the couple was served with a nourishing meal of fruits and milk mixed with almonds. "Here, take a sip, baby," Suresh said as he handed Ilakiya the cup after taking a sip himself. Ilakiya smiled and finished the rest, it was a family tradition after all, passed down through generations. The meal was believed to be both nourishing and auspicious for the couple, symbolizing prosperity and fertility.

    While the newlyweds waited in the living room, chatting and thanking the relatives, a team of decorators was busy transforming the room into a romantic haven. Ilakiya couldn't help but feel excited, "Wow, look at this beautiful decoration, Suresh, it's so beautiful," she said. Suresh smiled and replied, "Yes, it's perfect for our first night together." The room was decorated with diyas and flowers, creating a warm and inviting ambiance.

    Suresh was sent into the room first while Ilakiya was escorted in later by young unmarried girls. As per customs, the young girls would laugh three times at the doorway before sending the bride in. The tradition was believed to ward off any negative energy or evil spirits and ensure that the couple's first night together was peaceful and free of any negative influences. It was also thought to be a way of wishing the couple a joyful and fulfilling sexual relationship.

    Suresh was waiting nervously for his wife, his heart racing with anxiety. As Ilakiya entered the room, one of the girls playfully teased them from outside, "Enjoy you two! Don't be too shy now!" Ilakiya blushed.

    Suresh tried to lighten the mood by smiling and saying, "Don't worry, I'll take it from here." He could hear the girls giggling from the outside and knew they were probably wondering how the couple was faring on their first night together. Ilakiya, feeling shy and unsure of what to do, touched Suresh's feet to seek his blessings.

    Suresh, noticing her discomfort, lifted her up and said, "Don't bother yourself with these old formalities and feel free. We used to live in this same house together, but in different rooms. But somehow today feels special." He took her hand and led her to the bed, where they sat together.

    Ilakiya, still feeling a bit uneasy, asked, "What do we do now?" Suresh, sensing her nerves, replied, "Let's just sit here and talk. We have our whole lives together, there's no need to rush." Ilakiya felt a sense of relief and nodded in agreement. But the silence that followed was awkward.

    Ilakiya had mixed feelings about the situation. Just a few weeks ago, she was happily in a relationship with someone else, and now she was sitting next to her husband, feeling unsure and guilty.

    Suresh, sensing Ilakiya's discomfort, took her hand and said, "Ilakiya, I know this is hard for you. But let's start fresh, forget about the past, and build a future together. I promise to be a good husband to you." 

    He spoke the words with conviction, but deep down, he knew that he was hiding a secret from her - he was suffering from erectile dysfunction (ED). He had not yet opened up about this to anyone, not even his family. He knew that eventually, Ilakiya would discover his problem too. He was just prolonging the inevitable.

    As they sat on the bed together, Suresh couldn't help but feel a sense of fear and anxiety. He didn't want to disappoint Ilakiya or make her feel unwanted. He didn't know how to broach the subject or if he should bring it up at all.

    Ilakiya, unaware of Suresh's inner turmoil, smiled and said, "I know this is a special night, and I know you have all the privileges over me as my husband. But as you know, I've just come out of a heartbreak and this marriage seems too rushed for me. Can we please postpone this consummation for now? Give me some time to heal and come to terms with everything. I'll give myself to you fully when I'm ready. Trust me."

    Suresh felt a sense of relief wash over him as he heard Ilakiya's words. He had been worried about how she would react to his secret. He replied, "Of course, Ilakiya. I understand and I'm here for you. Take all the time you need."

    Ilakiya smiled, feeling a sense of trust and comfort in Suresh's words. 

    As the night drew to a close, Ilakiya said, "I'm feeling quite tired after a long day of wedding ceremonies, I think I just want to sleep now." Suresh, understanding her exhaustion, agreed and suggested they retire for the night. They both climbed into the same bed but decided to sleep separately, respecting each other's need for space and privacy.

    Ilakiya snuggled into the blankets, feeling grateful for Suresh's understanding and patience.          

    As Suresh lay on his side of the bed, he couldn't help but feel a sense of relief that he had managed to evade another day without revealing his secret. But he also knew that he couldn't keep this secret from Ilakiya forever. He couldn't shake off the feeling of guilt for not being honest with her from the start.

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 21 : Healing

    Anbu stepped into the yoga studio, looking around with interest. The receptionist greeted him with a smile and asked if he was looking for someone. "Yes," Anbu replied, "I'm looking for Geetha. She's a college friend of mine." The receptionist looked blank, clearly not recognizing the name.

    Anbu looked past her and noticed a neatly drawn organization chart on the wall, with photos of each member accompanied by their name and position within the organization. He started from the bottom and worked his way up, scanning the names and faces for Geetha. As he reached the top of the chart, he saw her. Sangeetha Rathnavel. Managing Director of Malaysia Yoga Institution (MAYI).

    Anbu pointed to the chart and said to the receptionist, "That's her, Sangeetha Rathnavel." The receptionist's eyes widened in recognition. "Oh, yes," she said, "Ms. Sangeetha is the Managing Director here. She's very busy, but I'll let her know you're here."

    Anbu thanked the receptionist and waited patiently as she made the call. A few minutes later, Sangeetha emerged from a back room, a look of surprise and delight on her face. "Anbu!" she exclaimed, "What are you doing here? It's been ages!"

    Anbu smiled and replied, "I was in the area and thought I'd drop by and say hello. I never knew you'd become such a big shot!"

    Sangeetha laughed. "It's been quite a journey," she said. "But come, let me give you a tour of the studio and we can catch up." And with that, the two old friends walked off together, chatting and laughing as they went.

    "I'm glad you're here, Anbu," she said. "I've been looking forward to having you in my meditation class. I think it will be beneficial for you." With that, she gestured for him to follow her and led him into her private office space. She instructed the receptionist to not disturb them and closed the door behind them.

    Once they were seated, Sangeetha turned to Anbu with a look of concern. "Anbu, is everything okay? I can sense that something is troubling you," she said, her voice filled with genuine care and empathy. 

    Anbu felt a wave of relief wash over him, knowing that he could talk to Sangeetha about his problems and that she would understand. 

    He opened up to Sangeetha about his recent breakup and how it had affected his work performance and family relationships. Sangeetha listened attentively, nodding and offering words of encouragement as he spoke. He shared with her about how he was struggling to cope with the emotional turmoil, feeling lost and alone.

    When he was done, Sangeetha assured him that the troubles he was facing could be remedied with meditation. "Anbu, I know this might be hard for you to believe right now, but I promise you, meditation can help you get out of this problem in no time. It will help you to clear your mind, and regain your focus, balance and peace." she said with a calm and soothing voice.

    Anbu looked at her skeptically, "I'm not sure, Geetha. I've never tried meditation before, and I'm not sure it's for me."

    Sangeetha smiled reassuringly, "That's understandable, but I assure you, meditation is for everyone. It's a simple practice that can bring a lot of benefits to your life. It will help you to let go of the past, and find inner peace. It will help you to gain clarity and focus, and to improve your relationships with others."

    Anbu thought about it for a moment, then nodded. "Okay, I'll give it a try." he said.

    Sangeetha smiled, "That's great, Anbu. I'm sure you'll find that meditation will be a valuable tool for you on your journey to healing and growth."

    With that, Sangeetha shared some basic meditation techniques with Anbu and scheduled him for a regular class. Anbu left the studio feeling a sense of hope and determination, ready to try meditation and start working on his emotional well-being.

    As Anbu started visiting the yoga studio regularly for Sangeetha's meditation classes, he grew closer and closer to her. Initially, he used to call her "Geetha," as he had known her in college, but as they spent more time together, he started to call her "Sang," a shortened version of her name that seemed to reflect the intimacy of their relationship. They started to hang out together outside of the studio, exploring the city and trying new restaurants.

    Their relationship was somewhat ambiguous, somewhere between romance and friendship. Neither of them was quite sure where they stood with each other, but they found comfort in each other's company. Sangeetha was a great listener and a source of support for Anbu as he navigated his emotional turmoil, and Anbu provided Sangeetha with a sense of excitement and adventure.

    They both found themselves looking forward to their time together, whether it was in the studio or out exploring the city. They enjoyed each other's company so much that they started to spend more and more time together, and soon, they realized that they had developed feelings for each other. They were unsure how to proceed, but they both knew that their relationship had grown into something special, something worth exploring further.

Life of Ilakiya : Chapter 20 : Happily Ever After?

    The atmosphere at the Midlands temple where Ilakiya and Suresh's wedding was taking place was one of grandeur and festivity. The temple, which was typically known for its traditional architecture and peaceful atmosphere, had been transformed into a grand wedding venue.

    The decorations around the temple were elaborate, with vibrant colors and intricate designs adorning the walls and pillars. Flowers and lights had been used to add an extra touch of beauty and elegance to the ceremony. The wedding altar where the ceremony takes place, was decorated with marigold flowers and banana leaves, adding a touch of tradition and culture to the wedding.

    The audience of the ceremony was a mix of family, friends and community members, all dressed in their finest traditional attire. The men were wearing traditional kurta-vesthi while the women were dressed in colorful sarees, adding to the vibrant atmosphere.

    The food arrangements were also grand and delicious. There were a variety of Indian vegetarian dishes being served, and the aroma of the food added to the festive atmosphere. There was a special area for the guests to sit and enjoy the meal.

    The wedding ceremony itself was a grand function, thanks to Mrs Meera. From the traditional rituals to the music, dance, and decorations, everything was arranged to perfection, making it a memorable and special event for everyone present.

    Overall, the ambiance at the Midlands temple was one of grandeur, festivity, and tradition, making it a perfect setting for the wedding of Ilakiya and Suresh.

    As Mr. Gopi, stood in the front row of the wedding ceremony, his heart was filled with a mix of emotions. He couldn't help but feel a sense of pride and happiness as he watched his daughter, Ilakiya was seated at the altar next to Suresh, the man she was about to marry. "I am so happy for my little girl," he thought to himself.

    But Gopi's thoughts were also filled with gratitude towards Mrs. Meera, Suresh's mother. He remembered the events that took place when they discovered that Ilakiya had been unfaithful to Suresh with her ex-boyfriend, Anbu. He had feared that the news would spread like wildfire, tarnishing the reputation of his family.

    But Mrs. Meera had surprised him with her unwavering support. "We trust Ilakiya and we know she's innocent," she had said. "We don't need to prove anything to anyone." And to Suresh, she said, "I trust Ilakiya and you should too. You have to accept her for who she is." 

    With her wise words and her trust, the marriage was expedited, and the news of Ilakiya's infidelity did not spread. For that, Gopi was indebted to Mrs. Meera for life. He knew that her big heart and wise words had saved his family's honor and he will always be grateful to her.

    Gopi stood at the altar, holding Ilakiya's hand tightly as he performed the traditional Kanyadaanam ceremony. He couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions - responsibility, pride, and a hint of sadness as he officially gave away his daughter in marriage.

    As Suresh stepped forward to apply Sindoor on Ilakiya's forehead and tied the Mangalsutra around her neck, Gopi's heart swelled with joy. 

    The temple priests recited mantras and performed the rituals, and Gopi couldn't help but feel a sense of awe as he watched the union of the couple being sanctified by the divine.

    As Ilakiya and Suresh exchanged flower garlands, symbolizing their acceptance of each other, Gopi couldn't help but feel a sense of happiness and contentment. He knew that his daughter was in good hands and that her future was bright.

    When the wedding ceremony came to an end, and the guests began to leave, Mr. Gopi sought out Mrs. Meera. He was overcome with emotion, tears welling up in his eyes as he held her hands.

     "Mrs. Meera, I can't thank you enough for your magnanimity," he said, his voice shaking with gratitude. "If it wasn't for you, my family would have died of shame because of Ilakiya's behavior. You are like a family deity to us."

    Gopi asked her what he could do in return for her kindness. Mrs. Meera smiled and replied, "All I want is for Ilakiya to bear the fruit of my son's love, a child. That would make me the happiest woman in the world."

    Gopi's eyes widened in surprise and then a smile crossed his face as he realized that this was the best gift that he could give to Meera. He promised her that he will do everything in his power to make it happen.